My wife spends too much money

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  • #44961
    Yorkie11
    Participant

    Hello kind people, I would like to get some advice how to talk with my wife. She is spending too much money and every single day. Okay, we are not poor, but she really doesn’t need all those stuff. She doesn’t even wear everything she buys, because guess why-she doesn’t have enough time to wear it! So we bought a new wardrobe for her, and already has four, and that is when I have realized that she has a serious problem. Any advice is welcomed.

    #44967
    Kerry100
    Participant

    Hey Yorkie, I was in the same situation a few years ago. Maybe it will help you a lot because I am a woman, and I like to spend a lot of money on clothes, makeup, accessories and all. My family realized that I have a problem, but I didn’t see it because we had a lot of money. Of course, having a lot of money is not an excuse, because she really doesn’t need all those stuff. What helped me the most is reading about minimalist life. She doesn’t need to go that far of course, but, have you heard about it?

    #45059
    Koolman
    Participant

    Yeah, minimalism is great for all those people that spend so much, but actually, don’t use all those stuff. Who can use it at all, because we don’t have 50 hours per day, right? Only 24. So, try to show her how much clothes she already has. Or maybe even, ask her is she trying to feel something else? Maybe she misses something, I don’t know, but buying a lot of things someone doesn’t need is always correlated to having some lack of emotional support. Maybe to try in that way? I don’t want to ask you about your personal relationship, but maybe she is not happy.

    #45123
    adamjonesvv
    Participant

    Koolman is right! I had the same problem, and it was an emotional buying, I literally ended up with my life coach because of spending too much. And yes, she may not be aware of that. Have you tried to talk to her yet? You know, but if you don’t talk honestly, you won’t solve anything. Or maybe her problem isn’t an emotional one, you need to tell us that. Maybe she likes to shop and to have everything that no one else has-because people like to compete with everyone, you know that…

    #45163
    Yorkie11
    Participant

    Wow, so many great answers! If I may be honest, I didn’t expect that. She doesn’t have any emotional problems and she is not an emotional buyer. I would rather describe it as-I buy it because I can. I have tried to tell her so many times that she doesn’t need all those stuff, and she said to me that we may not be so rich one day, so she needs it. But, I may see some differences, actually, because I was trying to implement your advice these days. I was trying to show her what she is doing indirectly, by doing the same she does by myself. I am not sure if that was a good move, but I think that she is now realizing how that looks like.

    #45204
    Matt B
    Participant

    I can understand the situation. Someone buys because he or she can, right? That’s her point, and besides that, she loves all those stuff. You have realized that problem from her psychological point because you never told us how it affects your budget. So, you think it is a personal issue, right? And yes, it is a personal issue and it can be treated. The way you behaved to show her how does that looks like is awesome and I think that it will work out.

    #45345
    Yorkie11
    Participant

    Hey people, my plan worked out! Thank you so much for your advice! We talked honestly about it and she admitted that he has a problem. Now, we have agreed that she puts the money aside every time she wants to buy something new (like she did before), so she will see how much we will have in a year. I am so happy that we succeeded, and you people helped me a lot!

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